The World of REBT: "Preaching the gospel according to St. Albert"

Philosophies of REBT for the religious person

Religious Philosophy of Unconditional Self-Acceptance

"I am a fallible, imperfect child of God, who will keep making some serious mistakes. My God is merciful and will always accept me as a sinner while urging me to be less sinful. Because my God accepts me unconditionally in spite of my failings, I can and will fully accept myself as a good person in his eyes and in my own life."

Religious Philosophy of Unconditional Other-Acceptance

"My God and my religion encourage me to love my neighbors and other wrongdoers, to pray for them, and to try to help them reform. Blessed am I if I am merciful and forgive the sinners but not their sins. Judge not, that ye be not judged."

Religious Philosophy of Unconditional Life-Acceptance and High Frustration Tolerance

"God cares for me and will help me to weather and cope with real misfortunes. If I trust in God and uncomplainingly accept life's tribulations, I will deal much better with them. God's will be done. In time, God will help me resolve my worst problems, for I have learned to find resources in myself whatever my circumstances."

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By Albert Ellis, from the book "Road to Tolerance" (Prometheus Books, 2004)

A collection of songs

A collection of Rational Humorous Songs can be found at here (external link)...

Four dialogues

Dialogue #1

Client: - I can’t do this.
Therapist: - Well if I cut one of your toes of every time you did it - would you then be able to?

Dialogue #2

Client: - How could they do this to me? How can they be the way they are?
Therapist: - Easily. They have no trouble being the abominable way they are. They are talented at being who they are.

Dialogue #3

A man was upset because his brother got married before his actual wedding. The man thought his brother absolutely should apologize and have told the truth and not lied. Therapist Ellis questioned his beliefs:

Therapist (socratic): - (1) Why does he HAVE TO tell the truth when he’s a talented liar? (2) Now why does he HAVE TO tell the truth? Because he doesn’t. (3) Why do you HAVE TO trust him?
Therapist (didactic): - Let him lie like a trooper for the rest of your life. Why can’t you be a happy human even if he’s lying, lying, lying?! Too damn bad, that’s the way he is! Let him lie, let him lie!

Dialogue #4

Client: - Joe lied to me and that made me furious
Therapist: - How could that, or Joe, get into your gut and make you furious?

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Dialogue #1 & #2 from Thinking Allowed Television Series, dialogue #3 from Advice Goddess Blo & dialogue #4 from Albert Ellis' Alfred Korzybski Memorial Lecture

RETMAN cartoon for children and adolescents

RETMAN is a cartoon character modeled to represent Albert Ellis himself. By courtesy of The International Institute for the Advanced Studies of Psychotherapy and Applied Mental Health, you can meet RETMAN here (external link).

REBT in a humoristic light

An example of the absurdness of denying emotional responsibility:
"The cream cake made me eat it"
On unrealistic expectations and unwillingness to pay the price of life:
"Sounds like you want your cake and eat it too—and lose weight besides."

A client's revelation to the therapist about the best moment in therapy:
"The day you observed that I took to awfulizing like a fly takes to shit."

Disturbance is to a large part taking things too seriously. Here are some sensible attitutes in a humoristic light from Albert Ellis:

"Musthood leads to shithood"
"You are a fallible, screwed- up human and you live in a fallible, screwed up society."
"Neurosis is just a high-class word for whining."
"Now go out and have a fu**ing ball, which is the true goal of life!"
"Life is spelled H-A-S-S-L-E for me and other people."
"You’ll always be a F(F)H – fallible, (f**k-up) human."
"If the Martians ever get down here they'll eighter die laughing or run back to Mars disgusted - assuming the Martians are reasonable sane; They might be crazy as we are."
"Masturbation is good and delicious, but musterbation is evil and pernicious"
“Stop 'Must-urbating' And Go Back To Happy Masturbating!”
"Adversities are not the end of the world; they are, unfortunately, part of the world"
"A little cult of us are exceptionally well-behaved, the rest of us is ultimately fallible human beings."
"You’re a fallible, screwed up human. That is your nature. That is your biology and your upbringing, both. It is heredity and environment."
"A doesn’t cause consequences. You cause them at "B" – the bullshit you believe"
"You'd better go back to 'it's a royal pain in the ass, but I can live with it.'
"I am what I do, is utter bullshit of the worst order."
"I am not a turd for acting turdily, and not a crum for acting crumily"
"Self-esteem is no more than perfume for shithood "

So, watch out for in-elegant solutions that just: "perfumes your wormhood"
Check if your mind is calibrated to "WIGO" ("What-Is-Going-On")
Go get better, you'd better: "PYA" ("Push Your Ass")
Watch out if you make yourself a "LOVE SLOB" (Demanding to always be loved)
Watch out if you put yourself into the arena of "TURDINESS" or "SHITHOOD" (To rate yourself badly)
A good attitude is: "TOUGH (SHIT)" and "T(F)B" ("Too (f**king) bad")

Three ways to tolerance

Unconditional self-acceptance

Means that you do not tolerate your destructive demands - your absolutistic shoulds, oughts, and musts - but replace them with flexible preferences: "I would distinctly like to do well and win the approval of others, but I don't have to do so. If and when I fail and get rejected, I can always accept myself, my being, while remaining intolerant of some of my behaviors.

Unconditional other-acceptance

Means that you do not tolerate the antisocial and sabotaging actions of other people, and you try help them change. But you always accept them, their personhood, and you never damn their total selves. You tolerate their humanity while disagreeing with some of their actions.

Unconditional life-acceptance

Means that you deplore adversities and injustices and do your best to rectify them. But when you can't change inevitable misfortunes, you un-upsetably accept them and do not enrage, panic, or depress yourself about them.

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By Albert Ellis, from the book "Road to Tolerance" (Prometheus Books, 2004)